Dear Little Kids on the Sidewalks,
I'm sorry that Steven is such a nut and is wearing a giant chicken costume 2 days before Halloween. I know it might be a little frightening, but he really is just trying to make people laugh!
Dear "Awww"-ers in the stores,
Yes, Marlee is ABSOLUTELY adorable in her ladybug costume, but didn't you see that I had the ladybug wings and antennae on too!! We match!!! Isn't that worth something!?
Dear Silvermine Subs employee,
Thanks for making a super delicious sandwich for me today, but I must let you know I'll never eat it again! One, there's a lot of onions on it. I don't really like onions. Two, it has 1011 calories and 69 grams of fat! I know, I'm disappointed too. But I just can't find it in myself to eat that again!