A few thoughts...

I know I've lacked in my blogging lately...but I'm a-mess with thoughts.

I've decided I want to write my own book. I'm not sure it would ever get published, but I feel I need to write out how I feel about being a mom. I guess we'll see when this gets off and running and how I really feel about it then!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm wondering what it would be like to actually have all my mental motivation come true. I've got all the right tools...the right skills...everything...to achieve my weight loss goals. But I let life take hold. I let the fact that when Steven is home we do nothing but sit around control my workout schedule. I don't know what it is, but I'm embarrassed to workout in front of him.

I asked him today if he would do some Yoga with me so that I wasn't stuck alone...but he told me no. I'm not sure what to do.

I can't go out and do my walks/jogs right now because we just got our first snow of the season...it's cold...and I keep getting sick!

I meet with a nutritionist about every 2 weeks...this should motivate me, right?! Yeah, it doesn't.

I log my food every week day (I don't weekends because I don't have computer contact) and I still eat 1900+ calories every stinkin' day!!

I'm at a loss...and not a good one!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have a rainbow striped box at home by the heater. Inside is my laptop. The one that has died..and I'm not sure if I can save it. The one that has ALL my photos from my study abroad in Ireland. The one that I loved having! But otherwise, I don't remember what else is in there... Maybe I'll do some treasure hunting and dig into it tonight... I hope there's something really good in it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~